Odd Fellows, how well do you understand sanctuary? I ask because lodges that serve their members to the fullest, provide some forms of it. Depending on your age or circumstances your introduction to sanctuary could look very different. At 44 years old, my earliest memory of the word came from two different movie versions of Quasimodo swinging into church and calling for protection against persecution, and violence.
Swashbuckling aside, those depictions do get to the heart of what sanctuary strives to be. It’s a recognized place of refuge, a place where confidence is kept, and where one is hidden behind a protective shield. A sanctuary is able to support those in dire need because a proven record of action has earned trust, and respect.
So how well does your lodge provide sanctuary – as both a space, and as a collective of people taking action in the wider world? What sense of protection could an embattled member feel from attending your meeting, or from relying on members outside of the lodge room? How confidently could an Odd Fellow share about personal hardship knowing that they will get
a helping hand rather than a blind eye, or a judging reply.
Here’s one personal example of the ways my lodge gives sanctuary.
My mom passed away on Sunday June 7th, not long after suffering a severe stroke. The loss is still fresh, and adjusting to life without her feels strange. Carol Love was technically my mother in law, but to one another we were always just mother and son. She became more of a mom to me in our roughly 15 years of connection, than my biological mother was during my lifetime.
Right after losing mom, I trusted my lodge community enough to share about the milestone and my layers of grief that came with it. My lodge had proven to me over time – through consistent action – that they would never view a member’s vulnerability as oversharing. I knew from both experience and observation that my lodge community would see my heartache as a call to action, and a reason to rally around me.
The support I have gotten from leaning into my lodge community has already gone well beyond texted well-wishes or cards — heartfelt and valuable as those messages are. Members have called, paced the backyard with me, and met me for coffee and conversation. The lodge cleared its busy community calendar to give my family a space for mom’s upcoming celebration of life. And members continue to check in to offer listening ears and sturdy shoulders as I navigate this complicated time of appointments, arrangements, and evolving emotions. Odd Fellows are holding space for me, even on days when I have no idea what I need.
And there is the sanctuary that my lodge offers. It’s not just a physical place of care and support with three links over the door. It is also a group of dedicated people who extend their protection and care beyond the lodge. They extend that care, recognizing that life may strike us violently, but that we can do mighty things to soften those blows, and to lift each other up again.
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